Something I’ve learnt in the past couple of months is a lot of people don’t know how to deal with the anxiety of other people. Anxiety is such a weird thing that doesn’t really make sense. I mean it doesn’t make sense to those who have it and it doesn’t make sense to those who witness it. I find myself trying to educate myself about how to deal with anxiety for myself and for those around me. Something I wish more people would do for their loved ones but hey. I have spoke up about my anxiety to a few friends and usually the response I get is “You’ll be okay.” That is the worst response anyone could ever give. It isn’t comforting, reassuring, it is actually sort of dismissive really. But I don’t hold it against them, they don’t mean any harm.
There are quite a number of things that people tend to say because they think they are helpful but in actuality it is not helpful at all. Here are some of the things that people think are helpful to say:
“It’ll pass. Cheer up.”
“You let yourself get sad”
“What could you possibly be so sad about? Your life isn’t that bad”
“Maybe just try not being sad. Maybe go outside”
There is a whole list of things that I’ve heard that just made me regret telling that particular person how I feel. Already expressing that you are sad to people makes you feel like you are bothering them and it makes it even worse when they give you a response that isn’t reassuring. I think that’s why a lot of people deal with things on their own or vent to strangers on the internet because they don’t want to bother the people in their lives. I know that’s my reason.
I can barely understand why I get sad sometimes or on edge. My heart races while I’m sitting at home and I’m overcome with this feeling of anxiety and I can’t explain it. I have moments I feel like running away, crying or simply just stopping my existence and I can’t explain why I feel that way to anyone. So you can imagine how distressing it is when someone just tells you to cheer up, it’ll go away and you’ve been feeling this way for a while now. I don’t like to talk about my mental health because there is this stigma that saying you have anxiety or are feeling depressed is an attention-seeking statement. People take one look at your life and think other people have it worse than you or you enjoy feeling this way so you aren’t trying to get better.
Anyway there’s this page on Instagram called The Depression Project that I have found to be a helpful, supportive, educating tool that maybe you could check out for yourself, for your friends or family. Mental health is a sensitive subject and I think it should be openly discussed without the stigma of being attention-seeking. This is just a random rambling about mental health. It has been on my mind lately figured I might as well.
I hope you guys are good and safe and healthy. Spread love, spread positivity.